How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
being pregnant is like rehab
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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