problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
