Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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