At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
