So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
