It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
