I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
