Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
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