good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
