There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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