I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize