I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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