we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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