we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
