there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I love you.
Bad choice
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize