I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
