We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize