perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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