And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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