fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
