Soap is not a condiment
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
