Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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