He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
