He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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