Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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