She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
