Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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