no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Umm I'm too high to move.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
