at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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