yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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