I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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