There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
