I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize