Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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