I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
