i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
