were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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