Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
