Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
