its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
