Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
