Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
