she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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