dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
