Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize