i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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