I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
