Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
