Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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