great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
