then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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