this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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